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Might as well start off this Friday (and a new topic) with The Impossible Quiz.

Friggin thing IS Impossible.

Largely due to the gigantic ACCESS DENIED screen I was staring at, 1/17th of a second after hittin your bum link ya J/A.

don't blame him you work for nazis!!!!!

I get there but don't see any game

I got there, got to the game and can confirm that is is fucking stupid.

Went there through another Webpage.

Pretty fucking bad.

Leading off the inning with a strikeout, Bass.

AhhhhBOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooo~!

Twin gay-porn stars arrested in rooftop burglaries

http://www.philly.com/philly/hp/news_update/20080227_Twin_gay-porn_stars_arrested_in_rooftop_burglaries.html


TWINS Keyontyli and Taleon Goffney have been arrested for allegedly breaking into area businesses by cutting rooftop holes to gain entry. Turns out, they were also just as skilled at breaking into their second, more respectable careers - as hardcore gay-porn stars.

Dear Abby: She's afraid her new hubby will father ugly kids

DEAR ABBY: I am married but have two children, "Venus" and "Adonis," from a previous relationship.
These children are very good-looking, and I'm not just saying that because I'm their mom.

My husband, "Herman," is ready for us to start our own family soon.

Not to sound shallow, but Herman was not a very cute kid. He wore thick glasses and braces as a child.

Whenever I am asked by either Herman or his family if I think he was a cute baby, I lie.

I know I would love our babies as much as I do Venus and Adonis, but I'm afraid they will not be as cute, and that everyone will know my older children have a different father.

These worries are causing me to have doubts about having kids with Herman.

Am I that shallow?

Am I not in love enough with Herman because I'm scared our children will be . . . ugly?

This is killing me.

Herman wants to start trying for a family this summer.

Help!

- Worried About Genetics,

Clarksville, Tenn.

I hope the response was "shoot yourself".

A cousin of my friend has one of the ugliest kids I've ever seen. We make fun of him behind his back for it.

EAG post a pic of the kid.

I wish I could, but it would melt the screen.

Flesh, the kid is jewish (seriously)

NTFF!

" This site is the biggest collection of assholes in one spot. I love it."

Is this him EAG?

Rock em Sock em

The slow motion replay kills me

"People shop peaceably in their malls at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."

Rock em Sock em

awesome. i'd pay money to watch this. i know its wrong. ahh, but its entertaining.

'id hit it'

I've got to give it to you NCSaintsFan, that was one of THE funniest threads I've read in a long time- Now I admit I was skeptical at first and almost quit reading, but then slowly I was drawn in like a raunchy fart in church until I was hooked like Hillary's dog is to peanut butter and then I found myself with milk all over the front of my shirt and on my keyboard and shoes

I'm speechless- A+

I think what Fred is trying to simply say, is that he wants to blow NCSaints fan. Enjoy the ride, enjoy the ride.

IMS you should take your act on the road, you're a regular Larry the cable guy

Child Molester Jumps To Death At Courthouse
Carlos Edward Tellos Was Facing More Than 20 Years In Prison


SANTA ANA, Calif. -- Authorities said a 52-year-old man jumped to his death at an Orange County courthouse hours after being convicted of child molestation.

Carlos Edward Tellos was facing more than 20 years in prison when he jumped from a ninth-floor balcony of the Central Justice Center in Santa Ana at about 4:10 p.m. Tuesday. Authorities said a suicide note was tucked into his clothing.

A jury in a Fullerton courtroom earlier Tuesday convicted Tellos of repeatedly molesting a young girl between 1989 and 1994.

It was unclear why Tellos ended up at the Santa Ana courthouse or how he was able to access the balcony, which was in a restricted area.

What are the odds that guy's family files some sort of suit against the city for allowing it to happen?

There's a "GGB" joke to be made here.
Have at it fellas.

Red Sox Scout Arrested for Masturbating in Front of Underage Girls
Posted Mar 4th 2008 2:07PM by Matt Watson
Filed under: Boston, Red Sox, AL East, MLB Police Blotter, Breaking News, The Word

Jesse Levis, a former big leaguer and current Red Sox scout, was arrested in Florida on Monday after allegedly standing naked in front of his hotel window and masturbating in view of two women and two underage girls on Sunday. He faces at least two felony charges for "committing lewd and lascivious acts in front of children under the age of 16," as well as other charges regarding the two women. From the Palm Beach Post:

According to an arrest report, the two girls, age 13 and 14, told police they had been swimming at the pool around 7 p.m. Sunday with their father when they saw Levis standing naked and masturbating at the window of his second-floor hotel room, which overlooks the pool.

Two older women, ages 20 and 29, also saw Levis, thinking at first he was just "checking them out," the report said. Levis had been at the window about 40 minutes, the witnesses told police.

Levis' explanation was that he had simply undressed, showered and got dressed again, apparently unaware that his closet was near a window with open curtains. Obviously, the police didn't believe him:

"His explanation didn't add up," said police spokesman Rob Vega. "We have four witnesses who say he was standing there 40 minutes. Rearranging your clothes and masturbating are definitely two different things."

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