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What is the real take home message of the bail out/take over of the Bear-Stearns situation?

I'm restructuring my investment portfolio but I'm not sure I want to go overboard and over-commit to only precious metals/oil or even currency.

As one of my colleagues (whom I don't particularly respect) says, "etc and so forth".

Invest in Chinese toilets.

Over a billion served and no end in sight- can you say "cha-ching"?.

Plus they got the bird flu- can you say "cha-ching cha-ching"?

Look at their diet- gotta make the insides rumble, know what I mean?

And don't forget they're already in the process of upgrading from the buckets in the corner in anticipation of all those Olympic heinies...

BUY! BUY! BUY!

Uh...translated, our soon to be 1 trillion dollar war will have rid us of the evil despot (who was defanged) and tanked the economy outright.

At least we aren't doing stem cell research and gay marriage is essentially unconstitutional. Thank the heavenly stars! Don't forget to spend your 600-1200 bucks!

Question for Jules (and/or GGB):

Do you know of a HDTV model that sleeps 4, can get me to work cheap and help me save money on pizza?

Thanks

Ummmmm.....Giselle?