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The minute Eagles tickets went on sale, I frantically dialed ticketmaster for two hours trying to get two tickets for the 10/23 Chargers game. I could not get through and now when I look online for tickets, people are trying to charge $500 for a set, and thats cheap.

I'm driving 500 miles from Detroit to (hopefully) see this game and at the very least tailgate. I am a die hard Eagles fan and I just want to go with one of my buddies to see the birds kick the shit out of the Chargers.

Can anyone sell me a reasonably priced pair of tickets to this game? If you do, I will buy you a case of Canadian beer for your tailgate party that day.

(Our hero looks pensively at the ant, scurrying to and fro in a desperate manner- before stepping on him and putting him out of his inevitable misery.)

Fade to black.

And SCENE!

That was the gayest response I think have ever heard. A simple "No, sorry, can't help you" would have sufficed.

That would be gayer

Indeed.

Nuttin gayer than beggin for tickets when nobody knows who the hell you are.


Die.

Die.

Let's be nice to this guy.

Get SARS.

Hey big spender... I know where you can get a ticket for the Bucs vs. Lions game in Tampa for $19.00!

This is fun.


Who has a bat?

Oh, and stuff your canadian beer ya pansy.

Of course, you'll not win any points from me with that Moniker, Jackhole.


Oh, boy, he has a case of CANADIAN beer!! Well, now, THAT really swings the decision!!


Hey, Toolbag, I'm a Lions fan and I'LL be going to the Chargers game for face value. Or at least whatever Seth tells me face value is, which could be $175 or so.

I should have known what the reaction was going to be looking for tix in the 700 level. God forbid anyone help me out in here.

And my Canadian beer is better than that Yuengling shit you fat fuckers drink.

By the way, go fuck yourselves!

Okay, I think that about wraps this one up.

Great jeorb, guys!

God forbid anyone help me out in here.

And for the record, people around here would go out of their way to help a fellow poster that they knew. It's all about being around for a while and having people get used to you.,

You forgot to add, "Crapfully yours, Uber."

If you already knew, you shouldn't have ever asked. Glad no "fat fuckers" went out of their way to help you. Hate Detroit? Go move closer to those beady-eyed head flappers.

I thought I would give it a shot. Didn't expect a fucking inquisition.

"Glad no "fat fuckers" went out of their way to help you"

I'm sure you're glad no one helped me you fat, silly bitch. I tried to be polite and thought, 'what the hell, what have I got to lose'. Then all you assholes jump down my throat and decide to be douchebags about it.

Beady-eyed head flappers? Steal that one from South Park, didja? Love your originality. Got any good canadian Simpsons jokes while you're at it? Silly bitch.

Love your originality.

This coming from the creative genius who brought us the screenname "DetroitSucks". He is obviously the authority.

Great reply, Jizzbag.



1. Originality? It's the offseason and I'm not wasting material on some narc that doesn't have two brain cells to rub together. I'll save it for someone who will give it right back and will be here longer than a week.

2. Does the 'Level look like a place that wants to become a spammer's paradise full of jagoffs like you asking for tickets everyday come week 1?

3 I'm fat? OH, I GET IT, from all the cheesesteaks I eat, right? Couldn't be farther from the truth, you, King of Originality, you, but that really cut to the core, I'll go cry in the corner now.

4. Save your polite bullshit. Does this look like a fucking tea party here?

5. Die

I am thoroughly impressed. In the last few days, I have been called: an ant, a pansy, a jackhole, a toolbag, a creative genius, a jizzbag, a 'jagoff'(?) and a narc. Can't wait to hear what's next.

I have been told to "die" and to "get SARS". SARS? What the fuck is this, the insult board of 2003? Are you going to tell me to catch the West Nile Virus next? How bout I catch me a mean battle with polio? Catch up with the times people, tell me to get caught in the crossfire of a wayward pipe bomb in London or at least get a random STD.

Miranda, you are not fat just because you eat too many cheesesteaks. Hoagies contribute to the problem too. Silly bitch.

And people are constantly complaining about my name? Ever been to this shithole of a city? Apparently I'm not scoring any points with GlennGoBlue, who I assume, based on his 'moniker', is a Michigan fan. All I got to say on that is that there's one University of Michigan and it's in East Lansing.

You don't like the shit that I'm saying, stop responding to me and maybe I'll shut up....and die.

You don't like the shit that I'm saying, stop responding to me and maybe I'll shut up....and die.

Maybe he's gonna fit in here, after all.

I hope you get the plague

I hear avian bird flu is the next big pandemic.

Although I think that leprosy is a big scarier. Imagine if DetroitSucks got that and his balls fell off. He'd start whining like a pussy on an internet messageboard.

All I got to say on that is that there's one University of Michigan and it's in East Lansing.

NTFF!!! 10!!

How's it goin', "little brother"? Still having any nightmares of Braylon??

Kind of surprised nobody has told him to go give Mr. Mexico a kiss, but uber I don't think he'll hang long enough to fit in, I think you guys just hurt his feeling and he felt the need to fight back...

Leprosy and the plague. Damn I wish I had thought of those. Rest assured uber, you will be the first to know when my balls fall off, cause I'm such a pussy and all.

Hurt my feelings? It's the fucking 700 level. I can take it just as much as I can dish it out. I innocently asked for help getting tickets on an Eagles fan site, got treated like an asshole for doing so and now some of you fuckers get sour when I start behaving like you. Deal with it.

Believe me, I have no intention of getting tickets through this site anymore but I am not going anywhere anytime soon.

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